30 Things I Learned Before Turning 30

  1. You will be happy again. Things will get dark. You’ll lose your way. Sometimes, you’ll lose yourself. But you have to fight for your happiness, and before you know it, you will be happy again one day.
  2. You don’t have to be in a relationship to feel whole. I spent way too many years in my twenties in serious relationships when the relationship I wish I would have focused on was the one with myself. I’ve enjoyed getting to know just who I am, but I wish I had started this journey sooner.
  3. Pick good friends. I’ve been lucky in this department (or I just know how to pick ’em!). My friends have been there for me when I wasn’t always present and wasn’t being such a good friend in return. Spending time with my friends makes my soul happy.
  4. Traveling is not overrated. I read once that everything looks better on television, and so traveling is overrated. THAT IS NOT TRUE! Things are much more magical in real life.
  5. Traveling alone is a must! Book a trip to a city you’ve always wanted to visit. Part of the fun is planning your itinerary before going. And no, it will not be weird or lonely to travel alone. If you want to check out my first experience traveling alone this year, check it out here.
  6. Parts of me still feel like a wild, clueless, but well-intentioned sixteen-year-old…and that’s okay! I can’t have it all figured out just because I’m a little older. I can still aspire to be this totally put-together gal that doesn’t spill coffee on her clothes and wears heels to work every day. But I understand every day is different, and I am different every day. It’s good to have this aspiration, but I won’t get down on myself for not living up to it daily.
  7. Living by yourself is a beautiful luxury. There’s something about having solitude in your home all to yourself. There’s something about decorating your space the way you want to and taking candlelit baths and reading by your windows without disturbances. If you have the means to try it out, do it.
  8. I may be turning thirty, but I am still immature in some areas. And I think that’s okay. There’s still plenty of time to “grow up.” It’s all part of self-discovery.
  9. Get a pet! It will teach you commitment and patience. Some of my happiest times have been sitting alone with my dog and laughing out loud at the weird things he does.
  10. Spending time with my family has made me the happiest. They are always my safest place. They are always my source of comfort. Don’t take your family for granted.
  11. You will never be too old for Disney World.
  12. Finding ways to keep growing and learning. Take a class in a subject that interests you. Read books that teach you something new. Learn to make some cool cocktails or learn how to play an instrument. I took guitar lessons this past year and it was one of the greatest experiences I’ve had.
  13. Work isn’t everything. Have career goals and strive for them, but don’t get so caught up that you don’t enjoy your time outside of work because you’re thinking about work. Be present.
  14. Therapy should be a basic necessity. I can’t live without it. Finding the right therapist takes work, but it’s so worth it.
  15. Curate your social media. If a certain account is making you feel bad about yourself, you find you’re comparing yourself to someone else, or an account is overly negative, UNFOLLOW. I have made it a point to only follow people and accounts that make me feel good and provide something valuable to my life. I want to see things that make me happy.
  16. I need loads of positivity in my life. Be it through podcasts, music, shows, or movies, I always need that extra kick of good and happy feelings. I don’t like drama, not even in my entertainment.
  17. Life will knock you down when you least expect it. Take baby steps to get back up. Forcing yourself to jump right back into your fast-paced schedule will only make you feel worse when you’re not up for it. Take some time to heal what you need to, then slowly find your way back to your routine.
  18. Have compassion with yourself. Just like we have an inner-critic, we ought to strive to have a compassionate voice in our heads as well.
  19. Stop comparing yourself to others! You will never find joy in this. Focus on yourself. Compete with yourself. Strive to simply become the best version of you.
  20. I love my body. It took me a long time to get here – thirty years give or take. This doesn’t mean I don’t constantly work on improving it and becoming a healthier me. It means I don’t hate on my body or speak negatively about it, and that has made the biggest difference for me.
  21. Trust your intuition. For a long time, I neglected mine and it caused me a lot of pain and anxiety. If you see red flags, if you have a bad feeling in the pit of your stomach, if something just does not feel right, trust that. Our bodies know things that we don’t.
  22. Do things before you’re ready. You can’t live life afraid. It’s always going to feel like you can be more prepared than you currently are. Everything will never be just right before you can start, so start first and then figure it out along the way. You’ll get the hang of it.
  23. Failure is a good teacher. You won’t always succeed the first time around. Hell, you may not succeed the fiftieth time around. But there will be lessons learned, always.
  24. Be proud of where you come from.
  25. Help others in any way you can, with what you have, and where you are.
  26. Take time for yourself. It’s okay not to say yes to everything. The people you matter to will understand when you have to take time for yourself.
  27. Dabble in learning to cook! I’ve learned a few recipes this past year and I love the feeling of being in the kitchen acting like I know what I’m doing. Knowing how to whip up something you can share with others gives you a little jolt of confidence. Plus, it’s nice to cook delicious homemade meals for yourself.
  28. Becoming self-aware. This has been one of the biggest lessons I’ve learned. We can’t take care of others unless we understand ourselves first — unless we can step back and understand why it is that we do the things we do. Be conscious of who you are.
  29. Rectifying childhood issues. For example, I have abandonment issues stemming from childhood. I wouldn’t know this if I didn’t go to therapy, and understanding it has helped me become aware of my thought patterns. You have to heal to keep growing. Also, healing is messy. It is not a magical moment with candles and incense. It hurts, but it makes you so much stronger when you come out the other end. And yes, you will always come out the other end.
  30. Don’t play games with people. Whether it’s with a new crush, a new friend, or even with your family, try not to be someone you’re not for the sake of what people will think. Be authentic. Be honest. Be yourself.
  31. And as a little bonus to carry on into a new, bolder, and more magical year, the best advice my mother has given me: “Quierete, y cuida tu corazon.” Love yourself, and take care of your heart. 

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